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05/01/2003 - 06/01/2003 06/01/2003 - 07/01/2003 07/01/2003 - 08/01/2003 08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003 09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003 10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003 11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003 12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004 01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004 02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004 04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004 05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004 06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004 07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004 08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004 09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004 10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004 12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005 Friday, July 30, 2004
we've been on the run driving in the sun
i want to be able to control things that involve me. i want to be able to choose the situations that i'm put in. i want to be able to live without worrying or pondering or hoping for just a moment or so. i want to be a kid with drive. maybe not a kid.
gotta go. the week's ended. happy birthdays to derek and sarah. and advanced bday to my bro and mr low.
blogger has changed their user template again. how interesting. preferred the older one.
i realise that the breaks from blogging somewhat only last a week or so. so i should just shut up and stop deceiving myself into thinking i've kicked the habit. but yah, i guess the fear of becoming one of those pple who bitch and complain and act like the sky's gonna come crashing down on all of us, oh and as well as appeasing my parents, takes priority. and of cos my studies apparently.
rawr :)
i think if you really think hard about it, you'll understand why from
night cycling last night was amazing.
:) i would like to introduce to everyone, a new fellar in my life. the hasa comp 1.0. delivered today, purchased yesterday, he's gonna bring a hell lot of happiness into my life :) i think i should name him. but i'll have to think about that for some time.
went back to rgs today, w jen n nurie, jen finally collected her o level cert. met quite a few juniors, realised they're all doing very well! 2 odac juniors running for head prefect, n 2 running for house capt. and i'm talking about 3 alogether (do the math, yes there is one extreme powerhouse (:), who are all in the odac comm. amazing stuff. good for them yah.
rgs compound brought back many memories, and the new building is nice. i love rgs!.. great memories there. woohoo.
i actually did my fluids tutorial and completed math s5 for tmr. goodness. jaw drops.
things to ponder.
do i walk like a hooligan/gangster/attitude problem.
do i study better in school or at home.
should i really buy the hanson cd. cant find it on bittorent.
do i slur my words n talk in mumbles.
is it time for a haircut.
how do pple keep their shirts tucked in w/o drawstrings.
alright time to sleep!
past few days have been happening, comm service on sunday was fun, qa on monday was disappointing, coupled with news that just wants to make you scream at the world and show the world what they deserve, or rather, what i think they deserve, and by tuesday i wanted the week to end. and now wednesday's here to show me that you dont always get what you want. hey cheer up look on the bright side. i go to school to see good people and come back having had at least one good moment, one carefree laugh, and hell, i guess that's worthy enough.
dashboard confessionals is still my obsession.
Pacific sun, you should have warned us, it gets so cold here.
And the night can freeze, before you set it on fire.
And our flares go unnoticed.
Diminished, faded just as soon as they are fired.
We are, we are, intrigued. We are, we are, invisible.
Oh how we've shouted, how we've screamed,
"Take notice, take interest, take me with you."
But all our fears fall on deaf ears tonight
They're burning the roads they've built to lead us to the light
And blinding our hearts with their shining lies
While closing our caskets cold and tight. But I'm dying to live.
Pacific sun, you should have warned us, these heights are dizzying,
And the climb can kill you long before the fall.
And our trails go unmarked and unmapped and covered
just as soon as they are crossed.
We are, we are, intriguing. We are, we are, desirable.
Oh how we've shouted, how we've screamed,
"Take notice, take interest, take me with you."
But all our fears fall on deaf ears tonight
They're burning the roads they've built to lead us to the light
And blinding our hearts with their shining lies
While closing our caskets cold and tight. But I'm dying to live.
this blog is gonna take a break for a while. till then..
now onwards i cant bring myself to trust you anymore, and i realise now
my mistake in having trusted you. if you thought what you said to
others was never to be repeated, unless of course by your own
trap, and hence couldnt be bothered to
illustrate what the truth really is, then i hope you
wisen up and learn that perhaps sometimes even your best friends have
better friends they like to share secrets with. if you can live with
two-frontedness, i cant. if you can lie, i was mistaken from the very
start. and since i think i know you have or can, then i guess
you know why things will or have changed.
on another
note, thanks to nizam, then bano n angelica, then lydia, for a
good long day today. good to see ya'll again.
yesterday was a day of mixed emotions. math tutorial killed me, cos
yeah definitely, a 48 for math is disappointing especially when it
comes as a shock. then flashbacks of june hols, the slacking that
shouldnt have been, and the day of the math test itself, my sneezing
fit day. then reasons for failing, like carelessness, no practice, no
determination. then came thinking abuot prelims. but then also came the
comforting from yafs n jen's faith that itll be ok, n tracy's good
grades [haha :)] n fang's empathy. i have a good class. n i have good
friends. n from that point on it was a better day cos, when you're
down, there isnt any other way to go but up. and pe was good. i love my
class. haha sarah :) i'm "watching you!" haha. hey 3g, ya'll are good
people. but i wont forget that feeling of disappointment and i'll try n
make it the turning point, the wake up call.
it is time to redefine n refocus.
i think saus is right, everything that happened, happened for a reason, and we all came out stronger after that. there are limits that can be pushed, but at the same time, we must not go overboard, and we have to respect each other and ultimately care for each other cos that's the only way something can be completed successfully, with good everlasting memories. i'm glad i went. my hasa was good. got to try eugene's bike also, it rocks. same gear shifting as jamz'. i think this was the most meaningful odac thing i've done in a longlong time cos the experience is one of a kind.
thanks to the organisers, the pros n speedies, the fun n determined participants: yuanxiang, jamz, eugene, zy, chuenkang, saus, mel, daryl. and to jayce n parents for being great hosts, n tiff n shi hui who came to watch the match at jayce's so that they'd be able to meet us halfway.
i love odac. n friends. :D
anyway, had a good time yesterday at jen's house, great party abeb, with compliments to ams as well, the co-host. haha. a balloon party is lots of fun!
going night cycling today, great opportunity to test out the hasa. hopefully he works fine. and will probably stop by someone's house (jayce?) to watch the finals at 2. yay. cya'll :) i'm i a good mood. wheee.